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Keep Rolling!

…Because some Riffs have it coming!

Written by RifftraxJune 16, 2019June 16, 2019

“This maybe the first car chase where every car has a beaded seat cushion.”

RiffTrax: Icebreaker

Written by RifftraxJune 16, 2019June 14, 2019

“Except that lay-about Beetle Bailey. He plays by nobody’s rules.”

RiffTrax: McBain

Written by RifftraxJune 15, 2019June 14, 2019

“You know what they say, leg health starts at the crotch.”

RiffTrax: Cyber Tracker

Written by RifftraxJune 15, 2019June 14, 2019

“Advice for anyone touching anything that’s been inside Daniel Baldwin: never touch anything that’s been inside Daniel Baldwin.”

RiffTrax: Yesterday’s Target

Written by RifftraxJune 14, 2019June 14, 2019

“In fact, I took a note about how he wasn’t taking notes. It’s in my notes.”

Rifftrax: The Astro-Zombies

Written by RifftraxJune 14, 2019June 14, 2019

“‘Guys Talking in Drab Rooms’ magazine gave this film five stars.”

RiffTrax: Killers from Space

Written by RifftraxJune 13, 2019June 8, 2019

“Erich Von Daniken’s Cocktail Shakers of the Gods.”

RiffTrax Presents: Warning From Space

Written by RifftraxJune 13, 2019June 8, 2019

“Never happened, Mr. Lady. No way, guy-sister. Not on my watch, uncle-grandma.”

RiffTrax: Arachnia

Written by RifftraxJune 12, 2019June 8, 2019

“I only date provosts.”

RiffTrax Presents: Deadly Instincts  

Written by RifftraxJune 12, 2019June 7, 2019

“I hope you like really tough, burnt meat and shitty scotch.”

RiffTrax: The Guy From Harlem

Written by RifftraxJune 11, 2019June 7, 2019

“Out of the way. We’re henchmen. We have important henching to do.”

RiffTrax Live: Time Chasers

Written by RifftraxJune 11, 2019June 11, 2019

“Yes, could you please say ‘skin of the plane’ one thousand percent less.”

RiffTrax Live: Time Chasers

Written by RifftraxJune 10, 2019June 11, 2019

“When numismatists rumble.”

RiffTrax: Honor and Glory

Written by RifftraxJune 10, 2019June 7, 2019

“Wow, I guess that sectional sofa dry-hump was better than it looked.”

RiffTrax: Replica

Written by RifftraxJune 9, 2019June 7, 2019

“They seem to be exploring a Brian Eno deep cut.”

RiffTrax: Bermuda Triangle

Written by RifftraxJune 9, 2019June 7, 2019

“The Mediterranean Deadpool searches for a mate using corny one-liners and fourth wall breaks.”

RiffTrax : Superargo and the Faceless Giants

Written by RifftraxJune 8, 2019June 7, 2019

“Flowers… candles… she really gets high school boys.”

RiffTrax Presents: High School Heroes

Written by RifftraxJune 8, 2019June 8, 2019

“And by ‘track practice’ he means lovingly painting pewter orcs for tomorrow’s D&D sesh.’

RiffTrax: The Power

Written by RifftraxJune 7, 2019June 6, 2019

“Chub. Chub. Chub.”

RiffTrax Shorts: Values: Telling The Truth (Live)

Written by RifftraxJune 7, 2019June 6, 2019

“Damn, it’s already planet o’clock.”

RiffTrax Live: Star Raiders

Written by RifftraxJune 6, 2019June 7, 2019

“How many cigarettes does a guy got to smoke to get some lettuce around here?”

RiffTrax: Psycho II

Written by RifftraxJune 6, 2019June 7, 2019

“But I made a kick-ass Dinah Shore road trip mixtape.”

RiffTrax: City of the Dead

Written by RifftraxJune 5, 2019June 7, 2019

“The walrus was arraigned in superior court on 36 counts of first degree oystercide.”

RiffTrax: Fun in Balloon Land

Written by RifftraxJune 5, 2019June 7, 2019

“Well, moral of the story is always save your chimp receipts.”

RiffTrax: The Incredible 2-Headed Transplant

Written by RifftraxJune 4, 2019June 7, 2019

“Junior high is going to eat you alive, dweebis.”

RiffTrax: Viva Knievel!

Written by RifftraxJune 4, 2019June 7, 2019

“Hey you. Your plaid game is weak.”

RiffTrax: Trucker’s Woman

Written by RifftraxJune 3, 2019June 7, 2019

“Oh no, clueless white guys doing reggae. Didn’t we learn nothing from 311 and Sublime?”

RiffTrax: The Apple

Written by RifftraxJune 3, 2019June 7, 2019

“They’ve greenlit Alvin and the Chipmunks IV: Munks in Da’ Hood.”

RiffTrax: Hawk The Slayer

Written by RifftraxJune 2, 2019June 7, 2019

“That’s the most awkwardly placed wall anus I’ve ever seen.”

RiffTrax: Psycho II

Written by RifftraxJune 2, 2019June 7, 2019

“She just realized the Dalai Lama started putting hashtag YOLO at the end of his tweets.”

RiffTrax Presents: Scared to Death

Written by RifftraxJune 1, 2019June 7, 2019

“You should be very proud my lady, you have your great-great-grandfather’s wang.”

RiffTrax: Brainiac

Written by RifftraxJune 1, 2019June 7, 2019

“Do some curls, brah. It’s always time for tonin’.”

RiffTrax: Retro Puppet Master

Written by RifftraxMay 31, 2019June 7, 2019

“A picture of Walt Disney to practice kissing with.”

RiffTrax Presents:The Amazing Mr. X

Written by RifftraxMay 30, 2019June 7, 2019

“Not many men are secure enough to hang their colonoscopy on the wall.”

Rifftrax: Grizzly

Written by RifftraxMay 29, 2019June 7, 2019

“Uh-oh. The Rats just bought a subwoofer.”

RiffTrax: Rats: Night of Terror

Written by RifftraxMay 28, 2019August 7, 2019

“Okay, by show of hands who was expecting to see a bag give birth tonight?”

RiffTrax Live: Summer Shorts Beach Party!

Written by RifftraxMay 27, 2019June 7, 2019

“Is it too late to be the mom on Family Ties?”

RiffTrax: Mutant

Written by RifftraxMay 26, 2019June 7, 2019

“Try not to think about our 36th president saying ‘bunghole.'”

RiffTrax: The Astro-Zombies  

Written by RifftraxMay 25, 2019June 7, 2019

“I never saw the School House Rock on mandatory minimums so I have no idea about the legality of this.”

RiffTrax Presents: Angels’ Revenge

Written by RifftraxMay 24, 2019June 7, 2019

“Also, what human being would ever say a sentence like: ”He grows organic apples which I buy from him?'”

RiffTrax: Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe

Written by RifftraxMay 23, 2019June 7, 2019

“Please Carrie, tone down the oppressive wackiness.”

RiffTrax: Prisoners of the Lost Universe

Written by RifftraxMay 22, 2019June 7, 2019

“Little Miss Muffet is out for revenge in the Tuffetening.”

RiffTrax: Kiss of the Tarantula

Written by RifftraxMay 21, 2019June 7, 2019

“She’s off to an assignation with her milliner.”

RiffTrax Presents: Sherlock Holmes: Dress to Kill

Written by RifftraxMay 20, 2019June 7, 2019

“Alfred Hitchcock: Soldier of Fortune.”

RiffTrax: Deadly Prey

Written by RifftraxMay 19, 2019June 7, 2019

“Do you even trickle down, bro?”

RiffTrax: Uninvited

Written by RifftraxMay 18, 2019June 7, 2019

“Souvenirs of Distinction. Looking for a plastic back scratcher with a sophisticated air? Try Souvenirs of Distinction.”

RiffTrax: Giant From The Unknown

Written by RifftraxMay 17, 2019June 7, 2019

“My favorite or-pan was Olivar Twast”

RiffTrax: Miami Connection

Written by RifftraxMay 16, 2019June 7, 2019

“Oh, here’s your problem. The whole transmission is clogged with souls.”

RiffTrax Live: Carnival of Souls

Written by RifftraxMay 15, 2019June 7, 2019

“Ah honey, try not to run like a Martin Short character.”

RiffTrax: The Son of Hercules: Land of Darkness

Written by RifftraxMay 14, 2019June 7, 2019

“Good thing they’re not playing Monopoly. It would be a lot less sexy if she was rubbing Marvin Gardens on her lips.”

RiffTrax: Wonder Women  

Written by RifftraxMay 13, 2019June 7, 2019

“Because I’m sick of people slut shaming recipients of non-profit funding.”

RiffTrax: Honor and Glory

Written by RifftraxMay 12, 2019June 7, 2019

“Golda Meir sold Tupperware?”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Wonderful World of Tupperware

Written by RifftraxMay 11, 2019January 8, 2022

Sketches & Speeches: The “They Call me ‘The Projector'” Sketch

Mike: They call me ‘The Projector.’

Written by RifftraxMay 10, 2019June 7, 2019

“You know, good dirty talk rarely involves the word ‘trouser.'”

RiffTrax Live: Space Mutiny

Written by RifftraxMay 9, 2019June 7, 2019

“Upside Down Shuffling on My Soccer Mattress: A Memoir.”

RiffTrax: The Sorcerer’s Apprentice

Written by RifftraxMay 8, 2019June 7, 2019

“Rebooting the ovarian operating system.”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Naturally a Girl

Written by RifftraxMay 7, 2019June 7, 2019

“I’m almost out of hand gestures. That’s how good it is.”

RiffTrax: Julie and Jack

Written by RifftraxMay 6, 2019September 3, 2020

“We hath 99 problems but a witch shall nary be one.”

RiffTrax: City of the Dead

Written by RifftraxMay 5, 2019June 7, 2019

“And she was saving her coccyx for marriage.”

RiffTrax Presents: High School Heroes

Written by RifftraxMay 4, 2019June 7, 2019

“Prince of Persia: The Matlock Years.”

RiffTrax: Retro Puppet Master

Written by RifftraxMay 3, 2019June 7, 2019

“We’re hot air balloonists and we’re here to help.”

RiffTrax: Frankenstein Island

Written by RifftraxMay 2, 2019June 7, 2019

“Blowing for Beginners: Horns.”

RiffTrax Shorts: Drawing for Beginners: The Triangle

Written by RifftraxMay 1, 2019June 7, 2019

“Hey! The Damned went by Party City on their way to hell.”

RiffTrax Live: Carnival of Souls

Written by RifftraxApril 30, 2019June 7, 2019

Mike: “Oh, so Excalibur is like putting a waterproofing sealant on your deck.” Bill: “Mike, that might be the most Minnesotan thing you’ve ever said.”

RiffTrax: Merlin The Return    

Written by RifftraxApril 29, 2019June 7, 2019

“They’re trying to vaporize us, but no worries man, it’s chill.”

RiffTrax Live: Space Mutiny

Written by RifftraxApril 28, 2019June 7, 2019

“Damn! I can’t think of a single book with the name ‘Potter’ in the title.”

RiffTrax Presents: Purple Death from Outer Space (with Matthew J. Elliott and Ian Potter)

Written by RifftraxApril 27, 2019June 7, 2019

“What did you do today? Oh, I put on a bikini and watched a guy make out while another guy in a suit yelled at him.”

RiffTrax: Zombie: I Eat Your Skin

Written by RifftraxApril 26, 2019June 7, 2019

“Hey, if it takes a world war and megalomania to get a couple communicating I say well done.”

RiffTrax Presents: She Demons

Written by RifftraxApril 25, 2019June 7, 2019

“It’s always nice to know when characters who aren’t in the movie are sword fishing.”

RiffTrax: Superhero and the Faceless Giants

Written by RifftraxApril 24, 2019June 7, 2019

“Extreme wizarding, brah.”

RiffTrax: Merlin the Return

Written by RifftraxApril 23, 2019June 17, 2019

“Yeah, that’s it baby. Let that narrative unfold through the choregraphy.”

RiffTrax: Final Justice

Written by RifftraxApril 22, 2019June 7, 2019

“White people: collect all seven.”

RiffTrax: Attack of The Puppet People

Written by RifftraxApril 21, 2019June 7, 2019

“This cyborg must be running vista.”

RiffTrax: Cyborg Cop 2

Written by RifftraxApril 20, 2019June 7, 2019

“Though your shirt opacity disgusts me.”

RiffTrax: Future Zone

Written by RifftraxApril 19, 2019June 7, 2019

“There’s gotta be something in here that makes the eighties bearable.”

RiffTrax Live: McGruff

Written by RifftraxApril 18, 2019June 7, 2019

“Meanwhile, Jesus carries a bucket.”

RiffTrax Live: Octaman

Written by RifftraxApril 17, 2019April 14, 2020

“His whole body is made of Madonna’s arms.”

RiffTrax: The Room

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