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…Because some Riffs have it coming!

Category: Mary Jo Pehl

Written by RifftraxSeptember 15, 2022September 15, 2022

“These shoulder pads are a full time job.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Troublemaker.

Written by RifftraxSeptember 7, 2022August 31, 2022

“For once, I’m glad I didn’t go to refrigeration school.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Spring Collection.

Written by RifftraxAugust 26, 2022August 1, 2022

“Oh Dick, I just love Slayer!”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Prom: It’s A Pleasure.

Written by RifftraxAugust 13, 2022July 30, 2022

“Discussing aging against a backdrop of today’s hottest baroque hits.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Maturing Woman.

Written by RifftraxAugust 1, 2022July 21, 2022

“Can we speak frankly about your stankiness?”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Shorts with Bridget & Mary Jo: The Joy of Living With Fragrance

Written by RifftraxJuly 23, 2022July 24, 2022

Sketches & Speeches: The “Gossip” Sketch

Mary Jo: Bridget, I want to gossip about you, but you’re my only coworker. So, do you mind?

Written by RifftraxJuly 3, 2022June 21, 2022

“People’s dreams are so boring even if they are wearing chaps in them.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Shorts: The Boy Who Didn’t Listen.

Written by RifftraxJuly 1, 2022June 20, 2022

Sketches & Speeches: The “Retrograde Thrust” Sketch

Mary Jo: Oh yeah, that must be the retrograde thrust.

Written by RifftraxJune 30, 2022June 20, 2022

“Do you like my tam o’ shanter?”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Blessed Midnight.

Written by RifftraxJune 22, 2022June 15, 2022

“All the great illusionists use carbon paper.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: The Amazing Mr. X.

Written by RifftraxJune 13, 2022June 11, 2022

“Teenage girls, notorious for their UFO skepticism.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Teenage Space Vampires.

Written by RifftraxJune 2, 2022June 1, 2022

PixTrax: “Someone might have advised him against the nerdy Hitler look.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Strange Impersonation.

Written by RifftraxMay 22, 2022March 29, 2022

“I hate when people have to bring their emotional support office supplies everywhere.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Speak Up, Andrew!

Written by RifftraxMay 19, 2022May 30, 2022

“I don’t care. I’ll just read my Sylvia Plath book of affirmations.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Shorts: Social Acceptability.

Written by RifftraxMay 8, 2022March 14, 2022

“Please don’t be a Charlie Chan movie. I’m not up to riffing anything problematic.”

The first riff from RiffTrax Presents: Sherlock Holmes: Terror By Night.

Written by RifftraxMay 5, 2022March 14, 2022

“I feel like you really get me, Rolf.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Sherlock Holmes and the Secret Weapon.

Written by RifftraxMay 2, 2022March 12, 2022

“Oh, come on! Anyone else’s pee except Igor’s.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: She Demons.

Written by RifftraxFebruary 26, 2022February 18, 2022

“Hey, my bare boobs put you through private school.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: He Sees You When You’re Sleeping.

Written by RifftraxFebruary 19, 2022February 6, 2022

“I think you misinterpreted my need to poop.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Children of the Bride.

Written by RifftraxFebruary 13, 2022February 6, 2022

Sketches & Speeches: The “Myself Being Kidnapped” Sketch

Mary Jo: You know what, I hand it to her. I personally wouldn’t want to draw attention to myself being kidnapped.

Written by RifftraxJanuary 22, 2022January 22, 2022

“Yes. Getting dressed in Minnesota takes half the day.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Play In The Snow.

Written by Andy BondJanuary 17, 2022January 16, 2022

“Come on. I made cigarettes for breakfast. “

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Phoebe.

Written by RifftraxJanuary 4, 2022January 5, 2022

Riff & React: Mary Jo & Oh, Boy! Babies!

Movie: Okay everybody, let’s get them diapered.

Written by RifftraxNovember 16, 2021February 8, 2022

“This movie contains uncredited dialogue written by Ed Wood. Enjoy in moderation.”

The first riff from RiffTrax Presents: Married Too Young.

Written by RifftraxNovember 15, 2021February 8, 2022

“I got to open envelopes!”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Marriage is a Partnership

Written by RifftraxNovember 6, 2021November 5, 2021

“We need to protect people from reactions we can’t predict.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Lucky Day.

Written by RifftraxOctober 27, 2021October 27, 2021

“Some women don’t match their outfits to the counter. Can you imagine, Bridget?

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Let’s Talk Turkey.

Written by RifftraxOctober 22, 2021February 8, 2022

“He’s always name dropping how his cousin is Rod of Asclepius.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Ladybug, Ladybug, Winter is Coming.

Written by RifftraxOctober 21, 2021October 20, 2021

Sketches and Speeches: The “Lady Mobster” Sketch

Mary Jo: Whoa, was this what it was like for you Bridget when you became a lady mobster?

Written by Andy BondOctober 11, 2021October 10, 2021

“Not New Yorker cartoon dry, but dry.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Keeping Clean and Neat.

Written by RifftraxSeptember 11, 2021September 9, 2021

Sketches & Speeches: The “That’s Classifieds” Sketch

Bridget: What ads are you putting in the paper?

Written by RifftraxSeptember 3, 2021September 1, 2021

“Which one of you jerk wads got my essay on Hume’s Dialogues Concerning Natural Religions?”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: High School U.S.A.

Written by RifftraxAugust 30, 2021August 29, 2021

“But don’t post anything on Facebook. King Herod is always online.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Have A Mary Jo Christmas and A Bridget New Year!

Written by RifftraxAugust 28, 2021January 31, 2022

“Boats. Photography. Caffeinated beverages. This movie has everything.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Before I Say Goodbye*

Written by RifftraxJuly 31, 2021July 30, 2021

“My heart. The doctor said I should avoid too much pizzazz.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Freddie Steps Out.

Written by RifftraxJuly 30, 2021July 29, 2021

“Once you see me eat 25 White Castle hamburgers, you’ll never want another woman.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Frankenstein’s Daughter.

Written by RifftraxJuly 9, 2021July 5, 2021

“Oh no, all the cows are wearing the same outfit.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Farm Family in Summer.

Written by RifftraxJuly 8, 2021July 5, 2021

“Hey, a little privacy. I’m trying to pollinate here.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Farm Family in Spring.

Written by RifftraxJune 26, 2021June 26, 2021

Sketches & Speeches: The “Are You High On Something “Sketch

Movie: Are you high on something?

Written by RifftraxJune 7, 2021June 6, 2021

“London isn’t international. It’s just in a different country.”

The first riff from RiffTrax Presents: Devil Girl From Mars.

Written by RifftraxMay 8, 2021May 6, 2021

“A codependent fairy godmother.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Cindy Goes To A Party.

Written by RifftraxMay 1, 2021April 27, 2021

“I hope Santa doesn’t bring him corn on the cob.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Charlie’s Christmas Secret.

Written by RifftraxApril 26, 2021April 25, 2021

“Every kitchen needs an Andy Warhol installation.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Campbell’s Soup: The Magic Shelf.

Written by RifftraxApril 18, 2021April 16, 2021

PixTrax: “Bryan Ferry and Bruce Dern: mad scientists.”

PixTrax pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Bridget and Mary Jo’s Halloween Safety and Monster Movie Mash-up.

Written by RifftraxApril 17, 2021April 16, 2021

“This Amazonian rainforest heat calls for a wool pashmina.”

Riff pulled RiffTrax Presents: Bride of the Gorilla.

Written by Andy BondApril 11, 2021April 8, 2021

“So, you want to hear about the new Lean Cuisine I had today?”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Boredom At Work.

Written by RifftraxApril 5, 2021April 4, 2021

“Flu shots and then cocktails.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Beyond Christmas.

Written by RifftraxMarch 24, 2021March 24, 2021

Sketches & Speeches: The “Daughter-In-Law” Sketch

Mary Jo: Bridget, did your daughter-in-law deep clean and redecorate your house on her honeymoon?

Written by RifftraxFebruary 6, 2021February 5, 2021

“How many steps did we get in? Enough to go to Chili’s?”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Angels’ Revenge.

Written by RifftraxJanuary 18, 2021January 20, 2021

“Aw, crap. Doc Severinsen is in our ceiling joist.”

Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: A Word To The Wives.

Written by RifftraxDecember 20, 2020December 30, 2020

PixTrax: “Nickelodeon’s ‘Eyes Wide Shut.'”

PixTrax pulled from RiffTrax: Bridget and Mary Jo’s Halloween Safety and Monster.

Written by RifftraxOctober 18, 2020October 18, 2020

Riff & React: “So, I’m a stingy, old flattop?”

Movie: So, I’m a stingy, old flattop?

Written by RifftraxSeptember 12, 2020September 8, 2020

Riff & React: Mary Jo & Bride of the Gorilla

Movie: Don’t fight before dinner.

Written by RifftraxAugust 30, 2020August 5, 2020

Golden Corral’s New Slogan Served By Last Woman On Earth

Movie: In a couple of days the stench alone will choke us.

Written by RifftraxMarch 14, 2020March 1, 2020

“Please don’t be a Charlie Chan movie. I’m not up to riffing anything problematic.”

The first riff of RiffTrax Presents: Sherlock Holmes – Terror By Night.

Written by RifftraxJanuary 10, 2020December 10, 2019

Sketches & Speeches: “The Cumberbatch Sketch”

Mary Jo: Cumberbatch is back.

Written by RifftraxJanuary 4, 2020January 11, 2020

Sketches & Speeches: “The Spaceship Cooling Down Sketch”

Mary Jo: Oh that’s right, there’s a spaceship cooling down.

Written by RifftraxDecember 17, 2019November 17, 2019

PixTrax: “He’s really putting out the BTUs.”

RiffTrax Presents: Have a Mary Jo Christmas  and a Bridget New Year

Written by RifftraxDecember 3, 2019November 10, 2019

“Each year, countless children are taken by hobos and forced into a life of Christmas caroling. This is just one story.”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Charlie’s Christmas Secret

Written by RifftraxNovember 29, 2019November 11, 2019

RiffTrax Track: “Beyond Jingle Bells”

RiffTrax Presents: Beyond Christmas

Written by RifftraxNovember 17, 2019November 5, 2019

“He’s always bringing up his vasovagal syncope.”

RiffTrax Presents: Vacation Days

Written by RifftraxOctober 7, 2019October 8, 2019

“Don’t you think it’s weird that we have to undress for social studies?”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Troublemaker

Written by RifftraxAugust 28, 2019July 7, 2019

“Sorry baby, I can’t hold you. I’m living a lifestyle.”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: American Look

Written by RifftraxAugust 25, 2019July 7, 2019

“I can’t believe she’s flirting with a gastropod.”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Ladybug, Ladybug, Winter Is Coming

Written by RifftraxAugust 20, 2019July 7, 2019

“No, they’re mixing border collie in with the organic and yard waste.”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Harry the Dirty Dog

Written by RifftraxAugust 9, 2019June 25, 2019

“Why won’t the kids today eat Waldorf salads?”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Girls are Better Than Ever

Written by RifftraxAugust 7, 2019July 7, 2019

“Get your little secret away from him.”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Boy Who Didn’t Listen

Written by RifftraxAugust 1, 2019June 25, 2019

Mary Jo: “Here comes her partner. The word is they are going to attempt the double Duran Duran.” Bridget: “That’s right. In this case, a Duran Duran Duran Duran “

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Flash That Smile            

Written by RifftraxJuly 28, 2019July 28, 2019

PixTrax: “Also, this guy’s posture is concerning. He has got such a cute shape. What doesn’t he stand up straight?”

RiffTrax Presents: Fear

Written by RifftraxJune 8, 2019June 7, 2019

“Flowers… candles… she really gets high school boys.”

RiffTrax Presents: High School Heroes

Written by RifftraxMay 31, 2019June 7, 2019

“A picture of Walt Disney to practice kissing with.”

RiffTrax Presents:The Amazing Mr. X

Written by RifftraxMay 21, 2019June 7, 2019

“She’s off to an assignation with her milliner.”

RiffTrax Presents: Sherlock Holmes: Dress to Kill

Written by RifftraxMay 8, 2019June 7, 2019

“Rebooting the ovarian operating system.”

RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Naturally a Girl

Written by RifftraxMay 5, 2019June 7, 2019

“And she was saving her coccyx for marriage.”

RiffTrax Presents: High School Heroes

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