“These shoulder pads are a full time job.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Troublemaker.
Category: Mary Jo Pehl
“For once, I’m glad I didn’t go to refrigeration school.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Spring Collection.
“Oh Dick, I just love Slayer!”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Prom: It’s A Pleasure.
“Discussing aging against a backdrop of today’s hottest baroque hits.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Maturing Woman.
“Can we speak frankly about your stankiness?”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Shorts with Bridget & Mary Jo: The Joy of Living With Fragrance
Sketches & Speeches: The “Gossip” Sketch
Mary Jo: Bridget, I want to gossip about you, but you’re my only coworker. So, do you mind?
“People’s dreams are so boring even if they are wearing chaps in them.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Shorts: The Boy Who Didn’t Listen.
Sketches & Speeches: The “Retrograde Thrust” Sketch
Mary Jo: Oh yeah, that must be the retrograde thrust.
“Do you like my tam o’ shanter?”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Blessed Midnight.
“All the great illusionists use carbon paper.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: The Amazing Mr. X.
“Teenage girls, notorious for their UFO skepticism.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Teenage Space Vampires.
PixTrax: “Someone might have advised him against the nerdy Hitler look.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Strange Impersonation.
“I hate when people have to bring their emotional support office supplies everywhere.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Speak Up, Andrew!
“I don’t care. I’ll just read my Sylvia Plath book of affirmations.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Shorts: Social Acceptability.
“Please don’t be a Charlie Chan movie. I’m not up to riffing anything problematic.”
The first riff from RiffTrax Presents: Sherlock Holmes: Terror By Night.
“I feel like you really get me, Rolf.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Sherlock Holmes and the Secret Weapon.
“Oh, come on! Anyone else’s pee except Igor’s.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: She Demons.
“Hey, my bare boobs put you through private school.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: He Sees You When You’re Sleeping.
“I think you misinterpreted my need to poop.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Children of the Bride.
Sketches & Speeches: The “Myself Being Kidnapped” Sketch
Mary Jo: You know what, I hand it to her. I personally wouldn’t want to draw attention to myself being kidnapped.
“Yes. Getting dressed in Minnesota takes half the day.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Play In The Snow.
“Come on. I made cigarettes for breakfast. “
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Phoebe.
Riff & React: Mary Jo & Oh, Boy! Babies!
Movie: Okay everybody, let’s get them diapered.
“This movie contains uncredited dialogue written by Ed Wood. Enjoy in moderation.”
The first riff from RiffTrax Presents: Married Too Young.
“I got to open envelopes!”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Marriage is a Partnership
“We need to protect people from reactions we can’t predict.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Lucky Day.
“Some women don’t match their outfits to the counter. Can you imagine, Bridget?
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Let’s Talk Turkey.
“He’s always name dropping how his cousin is Rod of Asclepius.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Ladybug, Ladybug, Winter is Coming.
Sketches and Speeches: The “Lady Mobster” Sketch
Mary Jo: Whoa, was this what it was like for you Bridget when you became a lady mobster?
“Not New Yorker cartoon dry, but dry.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Keeping Clean and Neat.
Sketches & Speeches: The “That’s Classifieds” Sketch
Bridget: What ads are you putting in the paper?
“Which one of you jerk wads got my essay on Hume’s Dialogues Concerning Natural Religions?”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: High School U.S.A.
“But don’t post anything on Facebook. King Herod is always online.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Have A Mary Jo Christmas and A Bridget New Year!
“Boats. Photography. Caffeinated beverages. This movie has everything.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Before I Say Goodbye*
“My heart. The doctor said I should avoid too much pizzazz.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Freddie Steps Out.
“Once you see me eat 25 White Castle hamburgers, you’ll never want another woman.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Frankenstein’s Daughter.
“Oh no, all the cows are wearing the same outfit.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Farm Family in Summer.
“Hey, a little privacy. I’m trying to pollinate here.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Farm Family in Spring.
Sketches & Speeches: The “Are You High On Something “Sketch
Movie: Are you high on something?
“London isn’t international. It’s just in a different country.”
The first riff from RiffTrax Presents: Devil Girl From Mars.
“A codependent fairy godmother.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Cindy Goes To A Party.
“I hope Santa doesn’t bring him corn on the cob.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Charlie’s Christmas Secret.
“Every kitchen needs an Andy Warhol installation.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Campbell’s Soup: The Magic Shelf.
PixTrax: “Bryan Ferry and Bruce Dern: mad scientists.”
PixTrax pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Bridget and Mary Jo’s Halloween Safety and Monster Movie Mash-up.
“This Amazonian rainforest heat calls for a wool pashmina.”
Riff pulled RiffTrax Presents: Bride of the Gorilla.
“So, you want to hear about the new Lean Cuisine I had today?”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Boredom At Work.
“Flu shots and then cocktails.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Beyond Christmas.
Sketches & Speeches: The “Daughter-In-Law” Sketch
Mary Jo: Bridget, did your daughter-in-law deep clean and redecorate your house on her honeymoon?
“How many steps did we get in? Enough to go to Chili’s?”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: Angels’ Revenge.
“Aw, crap. Doc Severinsen is in our ceiling joist.”
Riff pulled from RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: A Word To The Wives.
PixTrax: “Nickelodeon’s ‘Eyes Wide Shut.'”
PixTrax pulled from RiffTrax: Bridget and Mary Jo’s Halloween Safety and Monster.
Riff & React: “So, I’m a stingy, old flattop?”
Movie: So, I’m a stingy, old flattop?
Riff & React: Mary Jo & Bride of the Gorilla
Movie: Don’t fight before dinner.
Golden Corral’s New Slogan Served By Last Woman On Earth
Movie: In a couple of days the stench alone will choke us.
“Please don’t be a Charlie Chan movie. I’m not up to riffing anything problematic.”
The first riff of RiffTrax Presents: Sherlock Holmes – Terror By Night.
Sketches & Speeches: “The Cumberbatch Sketch”
Mary Jo: Cumberbatch is back.
Sketches & Speeches: “The Spaceship Cooling Down Sketch”
Mary Jo: Oh that’s right, there’s a spaceship cooling down.
PixTrax: “He’s really putting out the BTUs.”
RiffTrax Presents: Have a Mary Jo Christmas and a Bridget New Year
“Each year, countless children are taken by hobos and forced into a life of Christmas caroling. This is just one story.”
RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Charlie’s Christmas Secret
RiffTrax Track: “Beyond Jingle Bells”
RiffTrax Presents: Beyond Christmas
“He’s always bringing up his vasovagal syncope.”
RiffTrax Presents: Vacation Days
“Don’t you think it’s weird that we have to undress for social studies?”
RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Troublemaker
“Sorry baby, I can’t hold you. I’m living a lifestyle.”
RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: American Look
“I can’t believe she’s flirting with a gastropod.”
RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Ladybug, Ladybug, Winter Is Coming
“No, they’re mixing border collie in with the organic and yard waste.”
RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Harry the Dirty Dog
“Why won’t the kids today eat Waldorf salads?”
RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Girls are Better Than Ever
“Get your little secret away from him.”
RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: The Boy Who Didn’t Listen
Mary Jo: “Here comes her partner. The word is they are going to attempt the double Duran Duran.” Bridget: “That’s right. In this case, a Duran Duran Duran Duran “
RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Flash That Smile
“Flowers… candles… she really gets high school boys.”
RiffTrax Presents: High School Heroes
“A picture of Walt Disney to practice kissing with.”
RiffTrax Presents:The Amazing Mr. X
“She’s off to an assignation with her milliner.”
RiffTrax Presents: Sherlock Holmes: Dress to Kill
“Rebooting the ovarian operating system.”
RiffTrax Presents: RiffTrax Shorts: Naturally a Girl
“And she was saving her coccyx for marriage.”
RiffTrax Presents: High School Heroes
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